Topic(s): Family

Paul wrote, “And, ye fathers, provoke not your children to wrath: but bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord” (Eph. 6:4). What are some ways we can exasperate (provoke) our children?

• “Over-parenting” (smothering).

• Showing favoritism: “Why can’t you be more like your brother (sister)?” Jacob made this mistake (cf. Gen. 37).

• Forcing our unfulfilled dreams on them.

• Overly-criticizing and/or withholding approval. We can focus so much on what they aren’t doing, that we don’t see what they are doing. One said, “A father needs to be on his child’s team—not on his back” (cf. Rm. 14:19).

• Making them feel unimportant. Some parents send this message to their children: “I need career fulfillment now.  Sometimes I have to choose between my kids and my work. The children just have to understand” (cf. Tit. 2:4, 5). Spending time with our children is the best way to show our love (Eph. 5:16). Spending time says more and means more than spending money. Money can buy a toy, but without a momma or daddy to play with, toys are no fun.

Thou Shalt Not...

Topic(s): Family, Humor

A Sunday school teacher was discussing the Ten Commandments with her five and six-year-olds. After explaining the commandment to “Honor thy father and thy mother,” she asked, “is there a commandment that teaches us how to treat our brothers and sisters?” Without hesitating, one boy (the oldest in his family) answered, “Thou shall not kill.”

• What the mother says to the cradle goes all the way down to the coffin.

• The most important thing that a father can do for his children is to love their mother.  —Theodore M. Hesburgh

• The test of the morality of a society is what it does for its children.—Dietrich Bonhoeffer

Take This Communication Test!

Topic(s): Marriage

Take this little test with your mate. Insert your spouse’s name in the blank and answer the questions as you think your spouse sees you. (Copy this sheet if possible or keep your answers on a separate sheet.)

 Does __________________think you:

1. are considerate of others’ feelings? Yes No
2. allow money or things to spoil human relationships? Yes No
3. share how much you need him/her? Yes No
4. read enough on the subject of husband wife relations? Yes No
4. spend too much time on computer?     Yes No
5. talk excessively?     Yes No
6. do not share enough of your inner feelings?   Yes No
7. use words/phrases that are too easily misunderstood?   Yes No
8. have an overly critical attitude?    Yes No
9. have too much tendency to speak for the other person?   Yes No
10. have a tendency to interrupt another person?   Yes No
12. use too many words that belittle others?    Yes No
13. change the subject when it gets too uncomfortable
   for you? Or that you won’t even bring it up?   Yes No
13. nag too often?     Yes No
14. have trouble looking others in the eye?    Yes No
15. choose “peace” over sharing honest feelings?   Yes No
16. make too many excuses?    Yes No
17. clam up too often?    Yes No
18. watch too much TV?    Yes No 
19. read too much when home?    Yes No
20. are “off somewhere” (daydreaming) when he/she
   is talking to you?     Yes No
21. are sensitive when he/she is discouraged, troubled, hurt?  Yes No
22. are complimentary often enough?    Yes No
23. criticize him/her too often?    Yes No
24. are sarcastic too often?    Yes No
25. honestly try to see another person’s point of view?   Yes No
26. honestly enjoy listening to another’s point of view?   Yes No
  —From What Every Family Needs, Carl Brecheen and Paul Faulkner

 “…dwell with them according to knowledge, giving honour...as being heirs together of the grace of life; that your prayers be not hindered” —1 Peter 3:7

Two Builders

Topic(s): Family

The builder built a temple, he wrought it with grace and skill

Pillars, walls, and arches—fashioned to his will.

Men said as they saw its beauty, it will never know decay.

Great is thy skill—O, builder, thy fame shall live for aye.

 

The parent built a temple with loving and tender care,

Planning each arch with patience, laying each stone with a prayer.

Few noticed the preparation, none knew of the wondrous plan.

The temple you built, dear teacher, was unseen by the eyes of man.

 

However, the builder’s temple is gone, it has crumbled into dust.

Low lies its stately pillars, food for consuming rust

But the temple built by the parent will last while the ages roll,

For that beautiful, unseen temple is a child’s immortal soul.

—adapted from Hattie Ross Hall

• When I was a child, love to me was what the sea is to a fish: something you swim in while you are going about the important affairs of life. –P.L. Travers, New York Times Magazine

• It is not because things are difficult that we do not dare; it is because we do not dare that they are difficult. —Seneca